i think freckles, stretch marks, tattoos, bruises, birthmarks and scars are probably the coolest thing, you started with almost a blank canvas and look at u now, all this evidence that you’ve lived and the sun has shone on you and you’ve grown and maybe tripped up a few times and liked an image so much u made it a permanent part of u, beautiful.
That’s one of the most uplifting things I’ve readThis needs to get passed around more
Instead of with my coworkers I am currently spending my lunch break consuming burritos, cigarettes, mass amounts of diet soda and tears in my car in front of a dentist’s office.
In twenty minutes I will clean my ass up and go about my day subtly playing depressing music on my headphones while insisting that nothing is wrong.
This is how an adult handles rejection.
- take the GRE and prep for grad school.
- wash my face every night like a damn adult
- organize the bathroom
- Learn to sew a sun dress
- get out of debt and stop having nightmares reliving the day we lost both our sole sources of income on the very same day
- meet the grandmother I never knew I had. Learn from her as much as I can.
- learn to be okay with having no one to talk about any of this with
- love myself enough to let go of people that don’t want to be held on to
- love myself enough to take a chance on the people that have put themselves out there while I’ve stared at closed doors
- say yes.
- move on.
I was so happy for so very long that I genuinely believed those bleak days were a shadowy past, but like a ghost the numbing emptiness creeps up my walls and threatens to swallow my every hope whole.
I genuinely believed that the days of aching nothingness, sleepless nights, exhausted attempts to squeeze water out of sand, and wondering if I’ll ever be happy again…were over.
We found my biological grandparents after a lifetime of searching. My grandmother still lives. My grandfather was a dreamer that drank himself away.
Runs in the family.